Whetting your eyepitite (like appetite for your eyes)

22 Jun

Pound and Vision – The works of Ezra pound read by David Bowie with accompanying visuals that are made for exactly one pound

Briers Patch – Richard Briers presents celebrity clothing repair reality show in which celebrities must repair clothes while sitting in thorny hedgerows. Adrenaline fuelled.

All Hands on (Ant and) Dec: Its, rum, bum and concertina as the lads get kidnapped by amorous sex-pirates. Dark Comedy

Bacon and Greggs. Frances Bacon gets a job in a popular high street bakery chain.

Williams-swap: Robbie Williams and Rowan Williams swap lives for a week – with hilarious consequences.

South of the river: Popular beat combo ‘The Beautiful South’ travel up the Amazon to find tribal artifacts, but their voyage becomes one of self-discovery.

May Fair Lady: In which James May teaches waifs and strays to speak proper and of course – how to repair classic cars.

Blessed by Brian : Hilarious sitcom or reality show In which Brian Blessed becomes the pope

Sherlock Chrome: In which Holmes and Watson become leaders of a fifties American car gang.

The Gay House; Like the Edwardian house but everyone in the family has to be gay. An insightful social experiment

The Jedwardian house: X Factor Spin off in which the big haired twins open a bingo hall

Don’t Date your Mother: Series in which a young up for it bachelor has to pick between three eligible women, one of whom is his mother dolled up like a tart. Fiona Bruce to host.

Band of Rubbers: In which a group of valiant men go and show people all over the world how to practice safe sex. The twist is that once they’ve demonstrated how to use a condom – it all gets a bit sexy. Nicholas Parsons to host.

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